Motherhood brings so many changes in our lives! It even changes the circle of friends we have. As we expand our social circles and make new friends, the need for the unconditional support from old friends continues to increase. I often get asked how I cope up with 3 kids, family and work. Well, my support system plays a big role. And a group of friends with whom I can be myself, makes it easier. I consider myself grateful for the presence of some such people in my life.
Then and Now – Yeh Dosti Hum Nahi Chhodenge 🙂
If your phone’s contact list is anything like mine, you are sure to have a number of contacts like ‘Ajinkya’s Mom’, ‘Sayoni’s Mom’, ‘Radhika’s Mom’, ‘Gargi’s Dad’ and so on! These are the new friends life introduces us to. They are important to us not only because they can tell you what your child missed at school when he or she was sick, but also because their children are your children’s friends!
Other than these, my friends lists are made up of some fabulous women I met later in my life, mostly because of my own particular interests and pursuits. There are also some swell friends who I met because our husbands are friends. I love every single one of my friends and am always happy to meet them and spend time with them. They are the ones who always have a listening ear and words of encouragement for me.
“In the End, You Always Go Back to the People Who Were There In The Beginning”
And yet, I am most thankful for the friends that I made back in school. Watching a trailor of the new show “Yaadon ki Baarat“, I was prompted to write about my own re-connect with school memories. Through social media like Facebook and Whatsapp (God bless technology!), it has become possible to be re-united with school friends. I thank that moment of life when one of my friends thought of making use of this fabulous thing called ‘WhatsApp’ and brought us all together – once again!
School Memories
No matter how many time you recount your school memories to your kids or your husband, there is nothing like going over them with those who actually witnessed them. So once again, I get to re-live all the school functions, the dread of some teachers, samosas from the canteen and even the cat-fights between girls…lol. I remember seeing an episode of ‘Koffee with Karan’ where Karan Johar disclosed that he and Twinkle Khanna were school buddies and shared a lot of hilarious moments. My mind immediately flew to my own school memories. They would have been nothing if it wasn’t for my classmates.
“True Friends Are Never Apart. Maybe in Distance – But Never In Heart”
It is said that having a baby can make you feel young at heart. I agree… but so do your childhood friends! Out WhatsApp group is constantly abuzz with birthday and anniversary wishes from all over the world. An ‘adult’ joke can bring in a teasing ‘We will tell your name to teeeeacher’ and the ‘Class Monitor’ threatens with a punishment of writing something 50 times on the blackboard. How nostalgic all of it feels! You wish sometimes that you could turn back time and re-live your childhood.
We are not all happy-go-lucky all the time. We can flip in a second just like we did when in school. But the experience gathered over the years and the realization of the value of this friendship helps us overcome the little bumps in the road.
Motherhood Rants
The thing that still makes us shake our heads in amazement is that we are, most of us, mommies now! One minute, we are discussing how someone was slapped for trying to cheat during an exam – and the next, we are discussing our kids’ exams. And not just studies, either. This dear WhatsApp group is an 24×7 open spot where anyone can ask for advice, share their concerns and vent out. From irritating bosses, kids’ health, bossy MILs, jealous SILs, losses in business to asking for suggestions for a name for their new venture – everyone can drop in and lighten their hearts. Moms who have been friends forever are so supportive of each other.
“The Most Valuable Antiques are Old Friends”
Ah! That sentence reminds me of ‘Mom Friends Forever‘. Do you know about this mommy duo who share everything from Lipstick to Laundry and are best friends? Check them out. There is a reality show on their lives.
This can be made to happen in other groups that has moms too. But where else will you find friends who know you so well inside and out. There are no appearances to be kept and no pretenses to be made. They have seen the worst of you and are truly happy to see the best of you. At this point in our lives, we can even discuss some really intense topics like “Who got married to their ‘boyfriends of that time” (None did…lol). Makes you feel sixteen again, doesn’t it!
Re-Unions and Meet Ups
After one of the husbands remarked – “How many times do you re-unite?”, we decided to call them “meets” :). Meeting up with friends is the best way to stay sane. There have been times when I have been so worked up due to a particular situation in life, and meeting up friends has melted away all the stress. Meeting school friends when they are in town, or when you happen to visit their towns, is a treat. The ones who get to meet up are sure to complain of hours flying away too quickly, but the rest of the group is super-charged about the meet too. You are requested for group selfies and videos, what you are eating, what you talked about and every other detail so that the missing friends can feel a part of the reunions too!
One of the Best Things in Life – Meeting Old Friends and Saying – “Remember When”
Most of the times, we meet up at someone’s house or at coffee shops. Sometimes, when in the same city, some of us visit our school. And lately, the meets have become even more interesting. We have started meeting at important milestones such as a 10th Anniversary celebration, a 1st birthday etc. It is a whole new experience to see our kids play with each other…the same way that we used to!
Loving, encouraging, bickering, debating – it all happens within an old school friends group. But at the end of the day, you will no women as supportive of each other as old buddies. I don’t know if we all can live together in peace for the rest of our lives. But one thing I do know – we certainly cannot live without each other, that’s for sure!
You’re so lucky to have them!!