I am often asked by many of you about how I manage to do it all? Yes, I do multitask and try to cut down on wastage of time. But as moms, we tend to think we can (and have to) do it all. When we take on too much the result is overwhelm and stress. One of the simplest ways to get your situation under control is to ask for help.
The truth is a lot of people never even think to ask for help, particularly women. We are conditioned by society to handle things ourselves. Requesting help can often be a daunting task because we are afraid of appearing vulnerable or needy. And many women make the mistake of believing that they don’t need support because:
1) They are the only ones who can do the job right; and,
2) It will be faster if they do the task themselves rather than taking the time to explain it to someone else.
They key to striking a successful balance between your personal and work life is to get help.
Here are five easy steps you can take to get support and reduce your stress.
1. It is Okay to Ask for Help!
Acknowledge…admit to yourself… that support will help ease your load and make things happen faster. Just becoming aware that you could use some assistance and getting comfortable asking for it, can be the toughest part. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but rather a demonstration of inner strength and confidence.
2. Be Clear About the Kind of Help You Need
Before you ask for assistance get clear on why and what you are requesting. It is important to know exactly what you want someone to do when you approach them. Make a list of all your current needs emotional, financial and household and the type of support you require. Do not give people any wrong ideas about the type of support you need from them.
3. Get Help from Family and Friends
Explain your situation to those closest to you and ask for their support. Your family and friends want to see you happy and successful. And when you reach out to them, you will find that they respond in a loving and caring manner. It is our natural inclination as human beings to want to help each other. Have the courage to stretch outside your comfort zone and ask for help.
4. Hire Help and Delegate Tasks
Sort out your priorities and hire help in the most needed areas. Ask yourself if it is really a good idea to certain things yourself or will it be better if you delegate it. You can hire help to take care of household chores and cooking etc. Or hire a babysitter to take care of your children. Take a cab when you don’t have it in you to drive!
Maybe you love gardening but do not have enough time for it. Seeing your garden in neglect is only making you miserable. Go ahead and hire a gardener. Even if you love to do something, it does not mean you have to do everything yourself. Hiring a cook or a gardener only shows how much you yearn for these things to be perfect!
5. Take Care of Yourself
Moms often feel that if they are asking for help, they need to look busy every minute so they can justify asking for help. This is not correct. It is perfectly okay to ask for help with your chores and utilize that time to read a book or get a pedicure. Don’t feel that you cant ask others to step in and help you create some space for you. You are worth it!
Abba Lanong says
Lata couldn’t agree more well written!
Priya says
I think I am so bad at delegating that I end up doing it on my own .. I have faced so many problem post baby when I joined that I finally stopped overthinking and started asking for help every where in office home that made things a little better
https://rattlebabblebattle.wordpress.com
Rooshna says
I totally agree with you! There is no shame in asking/hiring help. It just boosts your productivity. And gives you peace of mind ☺
Alpana Deo says
I liked the first point that asking for help isn’t your weakness. Very true. We all need help and there shouldn’t be any feeling of shame.
Nice read! !
Raising Karma Blog (Shubhreet) says
Really helpful and supportive article for mothers trying to balance it all. I think most mothers feel the need to somehow accomplish everything in a day and to be honest, most of us can’t. I have myself been struggling with time over the last few weeks and reading this now has somehow calmed me down a bit. Thanks so much! 🙂
http://raisingkarma.in/looking-good-during-pregnancy-non-maternity-clothes/
Vasantha Vivek says
Much needed post for multitasking mom’s like me. I totally agree with your insights, Lata. Thanks for this post.
Dipika says
How true it is Lata, your post yet again talks about – we all are normal human beings!! Being mom doesn’t make us super powerful super natural beings.
Accepting we need help and seeking one is most important thing. Loved your tips.. delegation is good.
Shub says
Yups, no point in claiming to be a superwoman and stress / multitask everything…. better to ask for help and get it.
Menaka Bharathi says
Many times it does happen that we do not find the right words to ask help, you are right – you do not have to behave like a super mom when you can have some help
Afsha Galar says
I agree!! We should never shy from asking help!! It’s ok To not be able to do everything !!
Noopur says
Yeah that’s right, very well written lata